When my boys were little I worked at Gold’s Gym. Although it isn’t quite as it sounds. I worked in the daycare at Gold’s Gym. One of the perks was that I was able to workout for free. I also had access to personal trainers and got a discount for using their services. Unrealistically, I believed that I could work out and become the HOT mom. You know the one. The one who teenaged boys would dream about and get tongue tied over. But most days after working in the daycare, all I wanted to do was to go home. The boys wanted to go home. So, while I worked in a gym and was there 4-5 days a week, I never worked out. I still don’t work out (although I know I should). So much for being the HOT mom.
When I realized that I was never going to be the HOT mom, I decided I wanted to be the COOL mom. The mom who knows all the hottest actors/actresses, music groups, who has the BEST snacks, who usually says YES to sleepovers and doesn’t mind having dinner guests. Being a COOL mom seemed to be within my reach. Until I started working on my Master’s and until Chris was diagnosed with cancer. Working on my Master’s was tough enough as I was also working full-time, and it was during my student teaching that Chris was diagnosed (it will be 2 years in October). I was exhausted. Chris was exhausted and felt awful. And we walked around in a haze of disbelief. Entertainment went by the wayside. Snacks and dinner were sometimes the same thing so guests were out of the question. And sleepovers, well they were quite infrequent.
Things are slightly better now. I’m no longer going to school (but don’t have a job either) and have the ability to say YES to activities during the day. Dinner and snacks are still sometimes the same thing, but I am not bothered by it as much. Chris still feels awful on a regular basis making sleepovers a once in a while thing. My ambition to be the COOL mom; crushed.
Or maybe not. Several weeks ago David was performing in the musical Oz. It was a crazy weekend. My friend, Kathy, flew in from Illinois to see David. She arrived on Friday around 12:30 and from the airport we went to a job interview I had scheduled at 1:30 pm. David was at rehearsal and needed to be picked up at 4 pm and then back at the theater at 6 pm for a 7 pm performance. Kathy, Michael and I were selling concessions before, during intermission and after the performance. Saturday David needed to be back at the theater at 1 pm for a 2 pm performance. Kathy, Michael and I were selling concessions again. After the 2 pm performance, we went to a graduation party for a close family friend, had to get David back to the theater at 6 pm for the 7 pm performance and then Michael to soccer for a 7:15 game. Then back to get David at 9 pm. Wow!
David had been invited to the cast party following the final performance on Saturday. He tried to get a ride so that I would only have to pick him up, but he was unsuccessful. I really didn’t want him to miss the party, so I told him that I would be back to take him. Kathy, Michael and I went back to get David for the party. Of course, several other boys needed rides to the party. I was able to say YES to driving them and had just enough seat belts for everyone.
The party was in the Pinery (for my Colorado readers) and it was WAY up in the Pinery. I think we drove for 20 minutes once we got to the Pinery. The boys were somewhat slap-happy and being loud (just as they should be after a very intense week rehearsing for Oz and having 3 performances in 2 days). And then it happened. They all started singing. And they were singing Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey (or from GLEE as they are familiar with it). Surprisingly enough I had Journey’s Greatest Hits in the CD player! In the car! I was able to turn it on and the boys, Kathy and I were able to sing along. And the boys used their phones and ipods to simulate lighters as if they were at a concert. The music was loud, we were all singing, it was an amazingly COOL mom moment!
Who knows when the next COOL mom moment will occur. But this one moment, this single time in the history of my parenting, I was able to produce a moment that my boys (and maybe David’s friends) will remember for their entire lives. And that is pretty COOL.